NTNH CH.2

Discussing Labor Laws With a Ghost

Yu [B1] Zhengdu heard the words coming from the other end of the phone and was shocked. He stared blankly for a while in shock before coming back to his senses and said “Excuse me, my apologies, I don’t think I heard you clearly. Would you mind repeating what you said?”

The old man repeated his words accordingly, and solemnly emphasized: “Tongzhi, throughout my entire life never once have I done anything to offend heaven [B2] and earth. Even if I can’t reincarnate into a human, I worked like a dog [B3] my whole life, isn’t there the possibility to become an ox or a horse? Why am I going to be a pig?”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

He thought deeply for about thirty seconds before seriously replying “Daye[B4] , this is our office phone line, please don’t use it to crack jokes.” After saying that, he immediately hung up the phone. Have the elderly already gotten tired of square dancing and delivering eggs? He let out a rueful sigh as he went downstairs to get lunch. The morals of the public are degenerating day by day.

At the end of the lunch break, all of Yu Zhengdu’s new coworkers silently appeared back in the office without even so much as a squeak.

Yu Zhengdu didn’t take the prank call he received at noon to heart. He started to look online for different resignation letter templates, intending to write his and send it to Lu Lingxi before the work day ended. While in the middle of that he also browsed through WeChat, taking a look at any news that came up to find any new openings. At the same time he noticed that his classes’ WeChat group was currently active.

Anti-Bald Alliance[B5]

Zhang Qingqing: [Classmates[BP6] , look, ah, I got this awesome offer [B7] to beta test software at a company!]

Classmate A: [Waaaah, congratulations!]

Classmate B: [All of us with no jobs yet are crying ourselves hoarse[B8] ]

Classmate C: [‘crying ourselves hoarse’ +1 and envying the great name of Qingqing]

Zhang Qingqing: [What envy ahh? If you want to be jealous of me, then you have to be jealous of Zhengdu as well. Getting an early offer from Xinxing, now that’s a big company]

Zhu Yan: [_(:з」∠)_It’ true! Xinxing offered a competitive spot to a person in our year!]

Classmate A: [It seems so]

Hou Guangzong: [Ah, not anymore. I also got offered a place at Xinxing. A few days ago, I went to report in and didn’t see Zhengdu there.]

Classmate B: [Waah, Guangzong also took Xinxing’s offer? That’s amazing ahh]

Hou Guangzong: [It’s nothing it’s nothing, only a bit of good luck]

Zhang Qingqing: [I haven’t heard of that before now. Rather low-key about it, hmm[B9] ]

Classmate A: [@yuzhengdu, oh great top student, hey everybody, @ him, c’mere, c’mere]

Once he was finished writing his letter of resignation, Yu Zhengdu looked up to find he had been mentioned a dozen times in the group chat. Browsing through the conversation he saw

Hou Guangzong say ‘I got an offer from Xinxing as well’. He didn’t explain much though.

Yu Zhengdu: [Oh, I decided not to go for Xinxing Tech. I chose to work at a different company]

The class voiced their surprise, the students falling over each other to ask why Yu Zhengdu didn’t take Xinxing’s offer as well as what the name of the company he now worked at was.

Yu Zhengdu completely ignored the previous line of questions, and was about to say he was preparing to quit this new company. Right at that moment a grey-haired old man hurried into the firm. Stuttering around, he looked all around the area quickly before asking “Pardon me, is this Luofeng Life Management and Consulting?”

The mini company didn’t even have a reception desk, and Yu Zhengdu’s seat was not too far from the front entrance. He leaned halfway out of his seat and replied “It is, can I ask what affairs you have with us?”

“I came to this place to figure something out” The old man was simply brimming with tears, in one step he rushed forward. Taking out his cell he started to berate Yu Zhengdu. “Tongzhi, I’m Chen Kang. Early this morning I got your text…”

Yu Zhengdu didn’t come to his senses for a while. Taking a quick look at the old man’s phone, he could see a message in enlarged font displayed on the old device.

[Our dearest customer, your reincarnation time has properly arranged. On the morning of March 20, 2018, please queue up at the Fucheng Gujing Reincarnation Site and wait for your new reincarnation. Your queue number is 1022. Based on the merits and demits you accumulated during this life, your next life will be spent in the form of a breeding pig on a livestock farm. Please cherish the your final moments in this life. If you have any questions, we invite you to call the number: 000-xxxxxxx for consultation. – Luofeng Life Management and Consultation LTD]

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Yu Zhengdu: “? ? ? ? ?”

Yu Zhengdu: “! ! ! ! !”

He had to read through that text message twice in disbelief, only realizing after that what the old man had said on the phone was not some foolish joke. What was the explanation for this?

This proved that Luofeng Life Management was a complete sham company that he joined! It’s such a despicable company, it doesn't even spare the elderly in it’s schemes. Not only that, but the strategy used to defraud others was especially sub-par. To actually go so far as to deceive [BP10] an old man into thinking he was going to be reincarnated as a pig?!

He couldn’t help but be alarmed at the lengths people would go to swindle others.

Dragging the old man to the door, he lowered his voice and said “Xiansheng, this message is a scam. You must not believe it at all. Go home quickly, aright?”

The old man didn’t listen though, and kept saying: “No, I can’t, I must get a clear understanding. Tomorrow I’ll be reincarnated, this isn’t any joke……”

Yu Zhengdu felt a bit helpless. He had seen many old people like Chen Kang featured on the news. Because of a lack of judgement as well as fear of death, they tended to believe swindlers without a doubt. Some even went as far as obeying the directions they were given.

The situation before his eyes was a live example of such a thing.

Yu Zhengdu was about to pull Chen Kang outside to persuade him more, but a person from the consultation department had already come and discovered what was happening. He stood up and asked: “What’s going on?”

Yu Zhengdu prompty stuck Chen Kang behind him and said “it’s nothing to worry about…...”

Before he could finish his sentence, Chen Kang shouted out with impatience: “Tongzhi, my reincarnation information, there’s something wrong with it.”

That man couldn’t be stopped no matter what. Yu Zhengdu let out a breath. Now he must fight those evil forces face to face, how terrible. He was intended to give that colleague a righteous lecture when his body suddenly felt a flash of coldness. Then right before his eyes, he saw Chen Kang running in front of him, his figure looking a bit translucent and his shadow incomplete.

Yu Zhengdu: “…??”

He stood stunned for a while before it hit him- Chen Kang had ran directly through his body.

With a dumb stare, Yu Zhengdu looked at Chen Kang running to ask the consultor:

“Tongzhi, tongzhi, this is the message I received-“

The man in the consulting department gave him a warm welcome. “Please show your identity card.”

Chang Kang took out his card and handed it to him. The colleague gave it a look over and said “Please hold on, I’ll look up your profile.”

He moved his mouse, checking the computer for a while before apologizing to Chen Kang.

“I’m so very sorry. There was an incorrect computation with the calculation method of the Book of Life and Death. It miscalculated your merits and demerits. According to the actions of your past life, you should be reborn as a human in the next life, and to a very good family.”

Hearing those words, Chen Kang was bursting with joy and said excitedly: “Really?”

The colleague nodded his head: “Of course, of course. I corrected the results just now and will send a new text later. Please, go back and get ready for your reincarnation peacefully.”

Chen Kang thanked him gratefully, the two people exchanging pleasantries. The colleague probably felt embarrassed about the situation, so he insisted of seeing Chen Kang out of the company.

However, the two of them floated directly through the front door.

Yu Zhengdu stayed lifeless, watching the whole affair go down. After seeing the colleague and Chen Kang walk together through the wall, he finally got his voice back. Looking at the other coworkers, he asked: “Have any of you seen anything strange? Or am I hallucinating?”

His coworkers raised their heads, looked at each other, then shook their heads one after the other: “Nope, everything’s very normal.”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Possibly from hearing the commotion, the beautiful boss, Shang Que, left his office to see what was going on. “What’s the problem?” He asked.

Turning towards him, Yu Zhengdu’s face was extremely calm given the shock he just had.

“Laoban, I seem to have just met a ghost.”

As soon as the words were said, the coworker who sent off Chen Kang came back. Once again, he floated right through the door.

Not a muscle moved on Yu Zhengdu’s face. He still had the strength to tug Shang Que’s sleeve: “Did you see that, Laoban?”

He saw Shang Que’s face change, an annoyed look towards the colleague. “Kang Jin, why did you go through the wall again? How many times have I said, you’re working in an office in the human world. You have to look like a human, don’t go around with the habit of acting like a ghost.”

Kang Jin wasn’t expecting to be caught by the boss. He was so scared he tried to throw himself at him, clinging to his thigh [BP11] and saying with fright: “Ah ah ah, Laoban, I didn’t mean to do that, I wasn’t careful and forgot, pleaseeee I don’t want you to eat me, ahhh……”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

Kang Jin was so scared his entire body had become fuzzy. Once he was certain Shang Que wouldn’t eat him later, he secretly gave a sigh of relief and meekly ran back to his work desk.

Shang Que gave a dissatisfied little snort. Turning to Yu Zhengdu, he asked with concern befitting a capitalist: “Isn’t upsetting them just a bit exciting[BP12] ?”

Yu Zhengdu gave a polite yet stiff smile. The bosses words were quite subtle. Is it really just ‘a bit’ exciting?

Shang Que said with no remorse whatsoever: “I was originally going to let you get used to the work environment before telling you the truth……”

Yu Zhengdu looked at Shang Que’s beautiful face, a face so pretty it didn’t resemble an ordinary human’s, and felt utterly ridiculous for a while. He thought he ought to be afraid, but for some unknown reason he still had enough energy to start to bargain and asked,

“Laoban, is it still possible for me to resign?”

Shang Que looked at him in silence, after a while he said very slowly: “It goes without saying, we're very adapted to the needs of humans, of course you could have……”

Yu Zhengdu listened to his boss, who was quite possibly a ghost, or at least some other monster packed up in the skin of a capitalist, talk about ‘a humane system’. His sense of how absurd this whole thing was grew even stronger.

Shang Que pressed his thumbs together lightly: “However you already signed the business contract. It’s better you don’t resign until it expires……”

Yu Zhengdu was beyond words, still trying hard to fight for his rights. “In accordance with the labor laws, even if the contract got signed, the employee can still choose to leave at any time……” He was lacking the confidence to continue, thinking it was weird to discuss labor rules with ghosts.

Shand Que spread his hands: “In accordance with this world’s laws, there’s no problem. But you signed a contract from hell. Rounding it up, that’s basically the equivalent of signing a contract with a ghost. If you cancel it forcefully before you complete the agreed terms, it’s quite likely to bite back.”

Yu Zhengdu retorted bavely: “You did it on purpose, didn’t you? In a setting like this, should you have to inform the workers before they sign such a contract?”

Shang Que blinked: “Aren’t you wanting to quickly get your social insurance?”

Yu Zhengdu: “……”

It was more than he could bear. “Can your……company even be covered by social insurance?”

Shang Que nodded seriously: “It’s only proper that we should. We’re a proper company, registered with the industry and commerce office.”

Yu Zhengdu sputtered.

Socialism is too awesome, even ghosts go hardcore.

---

The translator has something to say:

I slogged through this one. Absolutely hilarious but the texting part... baidu help me because my friends sure didn't. goddammit I'm such a slow translator and absolutely ass when it comes to spelling so please excuse me. The only way I'm getting this all done is because of my free time (that's not free time at all but time better spent studying)

apologies again, I do hope this is readable. Let me know if there are any horrific spelling mistakes and I'll fix them asap

[B1]Reminder to make an apology about the notes because half of them is literally my rambling on and then I cp forgetting they exist if someone sees this let me know ☺️ [B2]It's an idiom that literally says 'injuring heaven and harming reason', or basically doing completely outrageous actions. We have a similar saying where we say 'heaven and earth' to place emphasis on the severity of something. [B3]This was another idiom, zuoniuzuoma, lit. meaning 'being an ox, being a horse', or working really hard. In English we use 'work like a dog' for the same thing. It's also a bit of a play on, where Chen Kang is saying he worked really hard this whole life and is there the possibility for him to reincarnate into a different animal so long as it's not a pig. [B4]Another word for uncle/ old man/ respectable honorific. [B5]It's 'fang tu liangmeng', or 'guarding/protecting against being bald union', Anti-Bald Alliance is a bit rough but it has the best ring. If I think of a better sounding one than I might change it later on. [BP6]She uses '童鞋們', or Tóngxiémen, which technically means 'children shoes', but is used to say 'colleagues/ coworkers', because it sounds similar to 同学 , or Tóngxué [B7]This was written in english [B8]Tongkushishen, crying of sadness to the point of losing voice. [B9]Fix this up later cause imabout to give myself a hernia but basically zhang qingqing is like 'oho, you got the offer? I haven't heard about that up until now. Keeping it on the dl are we?'. In the raws, she uses 'o' (add pinyin), which expresses her doubt about it. [BP10]Find new word [BP11]Hugging a thigh, currying favor with a more powerful person. It's seen a lot in transmigration novels so if you've ever read one of those you'll be familiar with the term. [BP12]Shang Que says 'cìjī ', a word that can mean 'to excite', or 'to upset'. In this use it sounds like he's saying 'oh isn't this a bit exciting', but with the wording it can hint as 'lol it's lowkey fun to make them think I'm going to eat them'. If I was any less tired I would think of a suitable line that makes the sentence a bit more subtle as well but I'll leave it for next time.